the levels of my mechanical incompetence continue to exceed my wildest expectations. Although in reality this should be no surprise having failed miserably to make a bike lock in metal working O level, sewed my friends hand to the machine in the "oh so politically correct" needlework class and managing to make the first  balsa wood yacht in history not to float in wood work lessons.

 I was riding the bike at night and noticed that the main beam would not switch off. I stopped several times to switch engine on and off to see whether the electrics had failed, a tip I learned from the IT technicians. On returning to the garage I tried all options and finally reasoned that this was a job for the experts at BMW. I phoned the dealer and explained the problem and agreed to take bike in.

On arrival I went to the service desk and I could see that the manager was already at this early stage doubting the validity of my claim. However as a valued customer I was directed to take the bike down to service bay. I showed the engineer the problem who informed with me without laughing that I had mistaken main beam on for off and with a flick of the switch and turn of the heel he was back to more important tasks making some strange hand gestures to his mates that looked like a twist grip issue on the other bike!

Suitably embarrassed and feeling as small as the Derby county points score I rode off with the biking equivalent of tail between legs!!!

Human nature distresses me Burma.......how can this happen.